i never thought i would come this far.
Never .. i thought i would give up half way through the treatment.
Alot of patient may have gone thru my part..
but i always think that why am i suffering so much in this illness..
i'm not a kid . i'm a 16 year old girl.
i'm tired of this .. i know there's cares & loves.
but i'm selfish cos i doesn't care .
i never care for people feeling ..
but i'm sensitive if people hates me.. but i would think but i doesn't really care.
cos i have no mood to care .
as i'm just a normal girl with stupid attitude..

but do i ever have the rights to choose not to have this illness..
i wish i have cos it wasnt easy to walk it alone....
And Before this Bone marrow transplant ,
i thought it was just a normal treatment.
and i use the method .. treat it as nothing happen ..
just like i first knew i have blood cancer..
it was not so easy as i thought ..
i wish i was a kid...
i so sorry to so much people.
Cos i have not taken my medicine for like ..
months. and i have skip my appointment but just like nearly 2 weeks..
if times turn back , i rather don wish to know i have this illness..
Cos it will let you felt tired easily..
as i'm a teenager . this is how i feel.

But i feel sorry to those who taken care of me in hospital..
They're the nurses and doctor.
this wasnt wad i wanted ..
i really try my best to stay strong..


i think i really have type somthing stupid..
cos nothing gonna end my life now..
and it wont ..
cos i also wont die..
and i wont commit suicide as it's stupid ..
:D